Love and acceptance are powerful emotions that drive us to seek intimacy. Learn more about the Ayurvedic doshas and how they impact our relationships...
Recall a time when you were heard with great attention by a loved one, or when you were entirely present while listening to a dear friend. When the warmth of a hug fills a part in you that you cannot put a finger on. The feeling that is the aftermath of an intimate encounter is indescribable and has a profound impact on our overall well-being. True intimacy means you trust someone enough to express your deepest fears and fantasies. You are your unfiltered self without any fear of being judged and are accepted for just who you are.
Love and acceptance are powerful emotions that drive us to seek intimacy. "Just as salt remains dissolved in sea water, love remains dissolved in human nature," states Swami Niranjanananda Saraswati of Bihar School of Yoga.
All life forms on Earth explore intimacy by following an order of partnership and moving in groups based on emotional and territorial preferences. Ayurveda, the ancient science of life which is at the core of Ananda's healing tradition, believes that a human's need to satiate all its emotions requires an experience of intimacy balanced out in the physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual body. Our individual personality in relation to the environment we breed in makes intimacy a very personal expression and desire.
The Doshas & IntimacyParallel to the western understanding of body and personality types, Ayurveda categorises all beings into three bio-circulatory forces, or doshas. A
dosha is a unique combination of the elemental forces that decide to dominate a body type from the time of birth, giving each person a unique mental identity to perceive and respond to intimacy.
Vata,
Pitta, and
Kapha are the three doshas, which, when out of balance, can affect various aspects of health, including intimacy. Understanding one's dosha and that of your partner's can create a harmonious relationship.
Let's briefly look at how each dosha responds to their emotional environment.
The Sensitive Vata
Vata dosha is characterized by lightness, movement, and creativity and exhibits spontaneity. A
vata is often social and enjoys making new connections. They may feel drawn to friends who share their interests in creativity, exploration, and intellectual discussions. The adaptable
vata approaches intimacy with enthusiasm. However, their tendency towards variability and instability may also manifest in fluctuating levels of desire or interest and require reassurance from their partners. They may seek partners who can provide stability and understanding.
Sensitive to touch,
vata enjoys a light, gentle touch that provides comfort and reassurance. Massage and other forms of nurturing touch greatly help the
vata type. They benefit from intimacy that provides warmth, comfort, and a sense of grounding to balance their inherent tendencies toward restlessness.
The Passionate PittaPitta is characterized by passion and ambition, and they admire loyalty and honesty in their relationships. They are assertive and direct in expressing their needs. The
pitta holds a small circle of close friends whom they trust and admire, appreciating those who are intellectually stimulating and share their passions.
Pitta's fiery nature may lead to a strong physical and emotional connection, but prone to perfectionism and competitiveness, the
pitta creates pressure or high expectations in intimate relationships.
Pitta individuals enjoy touch that is firm and invigorating, providing a sense of energy and vitality. They may enjoy activities like sports or physical exercise that allow them to release tension and recharge.
Pitta individuals may benefit from intimacy that fosters emotional connection, relaxation, and playfulness to balance their intense nature.
The Nurturing Kapha
Kapha is characterized by stability, nourishment, and loyalty; the
kapha personality types look for comfort and security in their relationships and are drawn to people who are compassionate and empathetic. A long-term commitment to a
kapha is very important, and their stable presence leads to deep connections with their partner. However,
Kapha types may also be prone to complacency or inertia, which can sometimes manifest as a lack of spontaneity or excitement in intimate relationships.
The tender and patient
kapha loves to hug and cuddle; these forms of expression promote a sense of emotional bonding in
kapha personality types. A partner or friend that brings variety, spontaneity, and stimulation to the environment helps to balance the
kapha's tendency towards stability and routine.
It is important to remember that people might have a combination of
doshas in varying quantities, and their lifestyle, environment, and personal experiences can influence their reactions to intimacy. Hence, consulting with an Ayurvedic practitioner can provide individualized advice on how to improve well-being and fulfillment in intimate relationships.
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