During a conversation about my sleep issues, Shikha Sud, a clinical hypnotherapist and energy healer at Ananda in the Himalayas, asked me something that made me pause and reflect. She said, “The question isn’t why you aren’t sleeping; the real question is: do you want to sleep?” Her words hit me hard, and I started to laugh. “Oh my God, you’re right,” I replied, “The truth is, I don’t want to sleep. It’s not that I can’t; I just don’t want to!”
As this realization came to the surface, I recognized the power of a spiritual hypnotherapist—someone who accepts answers only when they emerge without the interference of the critical, analytical mind. “The subconscious speaks in metaphors, which makes it impossible to lie,” says Shikha. “There’s no mechanism in the subconscious to manipulate the truth.”
In 2014, the term ‘bedtime procrastination’ was coined as a leading cause of sleep disorders. The endless stimulation from digital platforms has stretched our waking hours and made us constantly available to external demands, leaving little time for ourselves. Many people voluntarily delay their bedtime in a bid to reclaim some control over their day, a phenomenon known as revenge bedtime procrastination. This habit often starts in the mind but quickly manifests in the physical body, leading to fatigue, shallow breathing, poor decision-making, and sleep deprivation. Over time, these symptoms can spiral into more serious issues like insomnia, heart problems, hormonal imbalances, obesity, or even diabetes.Insomnia doesn’t develop overnight.
Shikha sees it as the result of an inability—or, more accurately, an unwillingness—to rest. What begins as a mental pattern eventually becomes a physical reality. “You’re not addicted to external stimuli,” she explains. “You’re addicted to overactivity—a sympathetic nervous system in overdrive, which shuts down the part of your brain responsible for rest.” As a result, you’re left feeling exhausted but wide awake.Shikha adds, “In my experience, sleep is closely linked to the emotional baggage we carry in our subconscious. Sleep is the subconscious mind’s way of telling us what we need to process or resolve. If we can connect with our subconscious, guidance will come through dreams or intuition. But because we are so caught up in external stimuli, our minds go into fight-or-flight mode, which leads to chronic anxiety, insomnia, and even depression.”
When it comes to dealing with insomnia, there are various methods to regulate sleep, such as essential oils, chamomile tea, face and foot massages, and switching off devices an hour before bed. These rituals can help, but as Shikha points out, “A restless mind that’s overloaded with unfinished tasks will only become more activated if these rituals are approached as just another item on the to-do list. Stop fighting your mind and start listening to it.”
Suggestions for Improving Your Relationship with Sleep
1. Connect with Your Inner Self : We often spend our days tuning out our feelings and conforming to what others expect from us. At bedtime, our minds demand attention, like a toddler. Create space in your day to do things you love, just for yourself. Reflect on how you feel about the events of the day and ensure your inner self feels heard and happy.
2. Transfer Mental Clutter to Paper : Before you go to bed, jot down everything that’s on your mind. Don’t edit or try to make sense of it—just let the thoughts flow. Once you’ve written everything down, destroy the paper. This process signals to your mind that you’ve released and completed those thoughts. Over time, this exercise will help you bring insights from your subconscious to the surface. Remember, this is different from keeping a gratitude journal.
3. Keep Night Rituals Simple : Create one simple night-time ritual and stick to it. The mind takes time to associate a ritual with sleep, so don’t overcomplicate it. Consistency is key.
4. Focus on the Basics : Avoid pushing your body into a stress cycle—it will only escalate. Try to wake up near sunrise, exercise regularly, eat healthy meals, and follow a fixed routine. This will ground your mind and body, creating a sense of calm and balance.
5. Detox Your Physical Body : A body burdened with toxins finds it difficult to rest. Consider undergoing a holistic detox or a Panchakarma treatment once or twice a year. A lighter physical system allows your mind to feel more at ease.
6. Seek Help from a Hypnotherapist : If sleeplessness persists despite your best efforts, consider working with a holistic hypnotherapist. They can help you connect with your subconscious to uncover the deep-rooted causes of your sleep disorder and recondition negative behavioral patterns.